Stiletto in the Face
Last Thursday, Gemma and I along with Breaker Babe, mental health guru Diane as well as a friend of mine who is the epitome of a Badass Breaker Babe, Sarah got polished up and attended The Maven Awards which celebrated Women in Business here in Winchester where we live. It was the inspiration of Natalie Hamer, founder of Maven Co-Working to highlight, support and empower women who have gone out on their own. Either built their career from scratch or started something totally new of their own after children, these nominated women are formidable and inspirational and we were there for it.
Celebrating other women’s success is very much at the core of who we are. We are grateful to Natalie for all she’s done to lead with the local community; to blow the horn and shine a light on the female skills and talent that is killing in it in their respective industries. We can’t wait to collaborate more. Together, we, women are unstoppable.
I recently had a conversation with a woman who was hugely accomplished in her career. She oozed with experience, confidence and that je ne sais quoi exuded by someone who has made it and is comfortable in her own skin. She asked what I did, I explained Breaker and how we want to help support and empower women. Help women break their own glass ceilings, provide a space for them to be. She retorted ‘That’s needed! I had many a stiletto in the eye as I rose to break my glass ceiling’. What she said hit me like a ton of bricks…or should I say shipment of Jimmy Choos. I also wanted to bottle up all of that confidence and swagger for myself and for other women and shout from the rooftop, we don’t have to bludgeon each other to the top!
Why is it that we compete with one another, hold each other down. I knew exactly what she was talking about, I had personally experienced as I rose through the ranks of my career prior to having children. The woman one or two rungs above me who called me greedy for asking for equal pay to my four male counterparts with almost identical CVs to mine. The woman who spent most of her interactions with other women talking about what she had to go through almost as if fighting for equal pay and against the motherhood penalty is some bro-like fraternity hazing; stating that we must earn our stripes before we can be taken seriously or consider the next step.
Olivia Petter writes about this in an article for the Independent and refers to the notion as Queen Bee Syndrome. She interviews psychologist Dr. Jessica Taylor who says…
“The world is a horrible but very successful and effective patriarchy, and we are all brought up to live and work in it...
Women and girls learn early on that they are in competition with other women and girls. Who is the prettiest? Who is the smartest? There can only be one, you see. And so they are taught to fight for the tiny scraps of power they may be afforded by crushing other women and girls.”
We need to do better. We MUST do better. If not for ourselves, for the future generations of girls, for our daughters. This is what motivates me, motivates Gemma with The Breaker Collective. So much so that this concept of collaboration not competition, supporting each other is embedded in several of our values.
INSPIRE - helping women to find their own voice and achieve their goals.
AUTHENTIC - facing opportunities and challenges with honesty and integrity.
COMMUNITY - to find solutions, support and respite with and from the people around you.
The next generation- Breaker Daughters.
Let’s pull each other up, like a supportive bra. Let’s not only reach out a hand to pull another woman up the ladder, but compliment her Louboutins or Nikes or Haivaianas on the way up.
Don’t forget our mums meet up this Friday morning to talk about the 4f’s Fun, Fitness, Food and Family. Bring your littles!
